What's up with bears these days? They are on a secret rampage or something. I feel like they are slowly plotting to take over the world — or at least New Jersey.
Well, not all bear news of late has been in Jersey. Take this disturbing story.
First of all, aren’t zoos supposed to protect animals? Isn’t that their point? And don’t the zookeepers feed the bears enough that they won’t go trolling for monkey meat?
I guess animals being animals, you could just say that this is part of the “ciirrccllleee of liiiiffeee…” but I can’t help but think of all those poor, traumatized children who thought they were going to see the cute teddy bears and monkeys play together in the safari park. Instead, they got a harsh reality check and a lesson in survival of the fittest. I’m just shocked a Fox camera crew wasn’t close by to film “When Animals Attack: Zoo Edition.”
The macaque in the photo looks like a defenseless stuffed animal being removed from a shelf by the bear. Aack. (How on earth did an AP photographer know to be at the zoo to take this photo? Maybe he has the Dutch zoo beat, and just waits for the day a story will break—and lo and behold, one finally did?)
Anyway, locally there have been several bear-human run ins, like this one in which a bear acts like a crazy crackhead and has to be taken down by the police. In this town, which I think is near Newark, a bear had to be gunned down because he assumed an aggressive stance even after getting tranquilized. And then in Seattle, a black bear roaming U of W's frat row was tranquilized and then tasered after he kept putting up a fight, leading to his death. (I actually wouldn't have minded if the bear had a few frat guys for lunch.)
Either we are on the road to Bear City or these poor bears are victims of social injustice (notice how all cases were black bears?? I'm sure there are brown, polar, and panda bears out there committing comparable crimes!!).
In any case, all you bears even thinking about attacking me, I'm no macaque. I'll run for my life, and if that doesn't work, I'll have my taser ready.
BEAR UPDATE: A 500-pound bear escapes from a breeding farm, barges its way into a woman's home, and nearly mauls her to death! WTF? It's a sign of the apocalypse people! Bears are rising up and won't take it anymore!
2 comments:
Ok-so this is interesting because I am starting to believe that we have a false sense of security at the zoo when an animal is not completely penned in-I mean, if there is open space between us and the animal then there is a chance for that animal to get around. They are, after all, pre-disposed to navigating terrain that does not include stair cases and sidewalks. I realize the bear and the monkey were sort of in the same pen, which leads me to my next point-I've always wondered how those safari type zoo set ups (like Epcot) keep the predatory animals from killing the others. Evidently the answer is, they don't always.
Also, it appears that bears are either on the uprise as you state (and I would probably agree, I think its obvious here) or we have just chosen to fixate on these attacks this year. Shark attacks are SOOO 2005.
And there is the record for longest post ever.
I mean longest comment ever
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